“…once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know, and holds us responsible to act.”
~Proverbs 24:12

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Whoopsi Daisy

Remember when I first posted about my Lent #fearfast and I said that I'm sure there would be be some time that I fall on my face in attempting to face my fear of failure? Yeah... Is happened. A few times.

One of the big steps I've committed to taking to face my debilitating fear of failure is to run a half marathon. (Just a half, because, really, is anyone's body suppose to ever run 26 miles? I think not.) So I signed up to run the Music City Half Marathon in Nashville. I've been struggling with IT Band issues, which gives me quite a lot of pain in my knee. But after some great physical therapy guidance and prayer, I've been able to start building my miles. But not without some pitfalls along the way...

Confession: I'm not very lady-like when I run. No. Not at all. Before I started taking a more natural and organic way to help with allergies, I would have to slow down—you know, from my speed of sound pace *eye-roll*—to blow my nose. The tissue would flap up in my face, down into my mouth. Whoopsi-Daisy. It was just a mess.

While I've seemed to have found a great solution to my terrible allergies, I still have a spitting issue. And by issue, I mean, while I have the need to spit during a run, I'm horrid at it. Literally, half the time, it ends up somewhere on my clothes, or even one time, back on my cheek. Beautiful. Whoopsi-Daisy.

But I keep running.

This week, I'm up in Chicago, showing my kiddos where I grew up. It's been great being up here, and we still have quite a bit planned. How have I not had a Chicago dog or Italian Beef yet?! But each weekend, I have my "long run" days. Yesterday, it was 10 miles. I've never in my life ran that far in one day. I did it. Barely. But I did it.

I hadn't kept up with the physical therapy strengthening I need to do for my IT band. I stretch...most days. I had to skip some short runs during the week. That is quite impossible to not have to do, being a church plant pastor. So i was in quite a bit of pain after the run. well, for the last three miles, really. I think when I first decided to do this #fearfast, I simply thought doing daring things and trusting on God would be the extent of it.

But it's more. It's a lot more.

Any calling from God requires preparation. While I wish it were the case, I can't just sign up for a 13.1 mile race one day and expect to run it well the next. There is training—physical, mental, spiritual—that has to be done. I need to stretch my muscles, strengthen them, and teach them how to run long distance. I need to keep challenging my mind to go that one more mile, to stop walking and get back into my pace. I need to strengthen my faith and stand firm in knowing God wants me to do this, He will be glorified through this. He wants me to grow in this way.

I'd love to just be able to run the half marathon now. To feel the exhilaration of accomplishing such a big feat. But...I suppose...it wouldn't be as exhilarating if it were easy.

So I'll do my best to keep with it. Keep challenging myself, keep increasing my distance. With more "Whoopsi-Daisys" sure to follow, I'll just click for a Power Song and keep going.

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