Ashes to Ashes

Wednesday was filled with firsts for us. It was our church plant's first Ash Wednesday service. I'm pretty sure it was Derek's first Ash Wednesday service...ever. Being raised Catholic, I have attended many Ash Wednesday services. (Memories of my high school friends and I going into the restroom after school Mass and "perfecting" the crosses on our forehead by dusting them off a bit came flooding back to me...) But for my husband, I don't think he had ever even attended such a service.

And that got me thinking...

Let me back track a bit. Derek is a pretty awesome guy. I know I'm biased, but I think the majority of people would agree. There's something...charismatic about him. He's a supportive husband, loyal friend, ridiculously fun "Papa," motivating leader, unique but upstanding pastor, and just all-around amazing guy. Wednesday evening made me realize once again how much he inspires me. How much he unintentionally prompts me to be a better...me.

He had never planned an Ash Wednesday service. He didn't have anyone with more knowledge telling him how best to explain Ash Wednesday to our church. He didn't have someone with more experience advising him how to coordinate such an event. The guy hadn't even BEEN to an Ash Wednesday service!

But he knew God was calling him to have one. And he listened. And he responded. There was never any fear of failure causing him to pause.

I thought about it as I was driving home that night. I thought about the impact the service had on the children of our church. It was interactive, tactile, spiritual, reflective—all things engaging for people 3 to 83.

I thought about the impact it made on people who attend other churches, but were looking for a place to recognize Ash Wednesday in our community. I thought about how it called people to reflect on their sins, their mortality, their needs, their love for God. I thought about it all and was inspired.

If Derek had let fear stop him from organizing such an event, God might not have been glorified in the way He was that night.

And what does that mean for me? How many times have I cheated God of receiving praise because I was too preoccupied with the fact that I might fail...?

This #fearfast is going to be good. It's already so good. And I'm so thankful for a man by my side who spurs me on in facing my fears. If he didn't face his, we would have missed out on a lot this Wednesday.

That picture right there ^^^ Those are Bennett's drawings—responses from the different stations at our Ash Wednesday service. And that guy fourth from the left? Yeah. That's Jesus. On the cross. Just another first for us Hunters that day. :)

#fearfast

Break out the feather dusters! The blog is back...and in desperate need of a face-lift. I'll get to that later.

So what's the deal? Why write a post? Why now?

I'm fasting. You know, for Lent.

In the past, I've given up—sacrificed—many things during Lent, from pop to red meat. In their place is a refocus on Jesus and what His life, death and resurrection mean. This year I'm doing something a little different. This year, I'm giving up fear. My own fear of failure.

Part of my problem has always been that I'm a perfectionist. I want to do everything 100 percent right on the first attempt. (Wow, that seems crazy after reading that back...) This has been debilitating, actually. Many times, I will stop myself from even starting something new, something challenging, if I don't think I can do it without error. (It's getting crazier...) I keep my eyes on my own strength. My own talents. My own inabilities. And I get stuck. At those times, gone is the voice that reminds me that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. (Yeah, I'm a mess!)

So, this season, that fear is out the door. I'm turning to God and giving it up. I'm listening to my Lord and moving forward. Facing my fear of failure might have me trying things, tripping and falling on my face. But I'm going to go. If He's calling me, I'm going to go.

Follow me on this journey. I'm sure there are going to be pitfalls. Laugh along with me as they happen. However, I'm sure there are going to be some pretty exciting mountaintops as well. #fearfast

Preview Service Eve And All That Is Racing Through My Mind

So, what is on a church planter's mind 12 hours before their first preview service...? Honestly, not a whole lot!

Wait, wait. Let me explain.

Crazy, direct, perfectionist, Type-A personality me ALWAYS has what feels like a bagillion things on my mind. Tonight, thanks to the peace of the Holy Spirit, an efficient and passionate God-made Launch Team, an anointed husband and the prayers of hundreds of friends around the world, I'm practically worry-free!

Why "practically," you ask? Well, the things I'm "worrying" about (and I use that term loosely), are ridiculous things, really. What if we run out of shirts? What if our preschool area isn't big enough? What if our snacks and coffee are devoured 20 minutes before service starts?

Seriously, Kat?

Yes. "What if?"

When planning for our first preview service (goodness, this isn't even our official LAUNCH!), we were optimistic. We thought, if we have 100 people at our very first service, that would just be absolutely amazing. And it would be! 50 people would be phenomenal! But God is reminding us yet again that what He has planned for those who love Him is greater than anything we can imagine! So tomorrow, "what if" we run out of food? Or free t-shirts? Or space? What if...more than we dreamed show up?


Well...that would be a very blessed problem to have! And it DEFNITELY would not be because of anything we have done. No, it is all, ALL His doing.

...and I'm humbled that He would include me in this party, even if it's just a party of 4.

And with that, I'm heading to bed before 10:00 PM on the eve of Restoration Community Church's first preview service. Crazy!

When Your "Nice Date Night Car" Is a Minivan

Derek and I got to experience something we don't normally have the opportunity to...date night!

Thanks to one of our second families, the Clarks, we had an entire evening to ourselves as the kiddos had their first non-family sleepover. And boy was it nice!

It started with me coming home, after dropping off the kiddos, to a beautiful $4.99 bouquet of flowers. Yeah. You read that right. Derek knows the discounted Kroger bouquets are appreciated much more than something more superfluous by this frugal gal.

We went to a new-to-us restaurant, The Red Pony, and enjoyed every savory bite of our two hour meal as we chatted away. (No toddler talk, people! I didn't have to ask anyone if they had to go potty. I didn't have to bribe my dinner partner to finish his delicious roasted beets or melt-in-your-mouth blue cheese and sweet corn risotto. And I didn't have to wipe anyone's fingers or face with a baby wipe when we were all through!)

But before all that, as we were getting ready to leave our (very quiet) house, I looked at Derek and asked him, hopeful of his answer, "What car are we taking?"

He looked at me. Smiled. Chuckled.

"The van, of course."

Relief.

We hopped in and were off, like two giggly teenagers on a first date. And it hit me... my how life has changed...

Instead of hoping my date picks me up in something shiny and fast, I'm thrilled we're riding in the Swagger Wagon. Instead of choosing between a Dooney & Burke or Louis Vuitton, I'm lessening the load of my purse by taking out unneeded matchbox cars and crayons.

As our lives change, so do our concepts of contentment.

There is very little I need to be happy. My God. My family. My friends. The rest is just...stuff. And what's the value of all our stuff, really?

Not much, says this frugal gal.

(Well...except baby wipes. Those things are worth their weight in gold when you have two toddlers 13-months apart!)

A Type A's 4-Letter Word

Get on the computer and do marketing contract work. Water the garden. Organize the playroom. Take the kids to the pool. Work on my "tough calling" project. Organize the playroom. Read more on church planting. Help D work on vision-casting. Organize the playroom. Do some writing. Organize the playroom. Organize the playroom.

Sometimes life can be a long list of to-do items. Even the playful things become actions to check off a list. Fellow high-strung Type As will know what I'm taking about. More qualitative evidence in support of the research that shows we are more likely to have a coronary episode.

Yet we continue on this pace until life gives us an ugly slap in the face, leaving us with no choice but to slow down.

Unless...

Unless we make a conscious effort to make R-E-S-T a requirement.

For some of us, we may have to physically write it down in our day planners. "Do Nothing Today." "Take a Break." "Just Hang Out with the Kiddos."

Other times, we'll notice that the crazy pace we have become used to is slowly catching up to our over-stimulated children. We take a rest for their good.

Other times our awesome spouses will make the suggestion. For our own good.

Either way, we have to face our 4-letter word. Put off work for another day. Web sites can be updated later. Research can be done tomorrow. Playdates can be rescheduled.

Clear your schedule. Go with the flow. Stop to enjoy the sunshine, your kids laughter, the Word of God, a hot cup of coffee.

It'll be better if we make rest a requiement, before life gives us no other option.